


Puzzles of Our Cats

by ryekamasaki



Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Cats, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-24
Updated: 2015-08-11
Packaged: 2018-04-14 23:20:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 15,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4583973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ryekamasaki/pseuds/ryekamasaki
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A bunch of fics of varying lengths set in the future of ezzydean's Puzzles of Our Lives AU, for which I had provided the original prompt. These are all relating around the accumulation of a bunch of cats to Haru and Sousuke's lives, and what they and their friends go through with them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. SouHaru and Their 15 (Thousand) Cats

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Shatter My Illusion of You](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3609855) by [EzzyDean](https://archiveofourown.org/users/EzzyDean/pseuds/EzzyDean). 



> So, once upon a time, I prompted ezzydean with what would later become her Puzzles of Our Souls AU. (Which is fantastic, and you should go read it if you haven’t already.) The other night we spent a few hours talking on and off about how Sousuke and Haru wind up owning 15 (thousand) cats. This is that story.

Sousuke and Haru’s apartment has what you could call an open door policy. There is, quite literally, always an open door (or window) somewhere wherein any of their friends can mosey on in as they like. This open door (and window) policy also extends to what Sousuke adamantly calls unwanted guests, though Haru is quite satisfied knowing that Sousuke is a liar and will never admit that he actually enjoys the furry company.

Cats. Cats everywhere. Sousuke has a thing with cats, and he does not appreciate his space being taken over like this. What had started as the beginning of a massive and all encompassing prank war that at this point neither of the boys could tell you exactly who started and why, had come to an end with what Sousuke very reluctantly eventually considered an extending of their unconventional family.

The apartment is now home to what must be the entire town’s cat population. Haru loves that the cats seem to like him so much, and is not so secretly pleased about the fact that even more than the cats like him, they like Sousuke. Sousuke does not find this amusing at all. Haru’s mackerel habit is definitely a factor in how much the cats enjoy the apartment.

Sousuke finds cats everywhere. There is a cat in his usual spot on the couch, and one on the television, and one in his bed, comfortably perched on his pillow. Cats greet him in the bathroom, after he showers, rubbing against his ankles before he even has a chance to dry off. Haru finds it mildly amusing when Sousuke complains about it. Even after he disentangles from the pile of fur winding its way through his ankles, he finds yet another furball happily ensconced within his underwear drawer.

Eventually the Sousuke and Haru take to actually naming the cats. Pearl is a cream colored cat that has a tendency to take a nap in the bathroom sink. Macky and Saba are nearly identical gray cats, and Macky has a habit, that Sousuke pretends is disgusting but is secretly proud of, in which he brings Sousuke dead birds. Saba is the ruler of the television, from which he indiscriminately judges everyone in sight. There is also Blacky and Mittens and Socks. Koko’s favorite place is the couch, and she blends into it perfectly.

The first cat to be named after one of their friends is a tiny kitten that mewls pathetically when it feels like its not having enough attention paid to it. The first time this happens, Sousuke and Haru instantly look at each other and declare ‘Rin’.

The next kitten to remind them of a friend is a tiny little light gray kitten, the runt of its litter, that has a proclivity for falling asleep in Sousuke’s shoes. They name this one Ai. Ai has absolutely no fear, and will not let any of the other cats boss him around. Sousuke one day witnesses a huge Doberman running for its life down their street, and thinking perhaps a car or larger dog was behind it, Sousuke checks before continuing on his way, only to see tiny Ai chasing the dog.

A playful orange tabby that has a tendency to bring live beetles into the house to play with is affectionately dubbed Little Momo. Haru sees this and tells the cat that it should be eating them and not playing with them, but predictably the cat ignores this advice. They can try to get rid of the beetles but Little Momo just brings them back.

Sousuke has a particularly horrible morning one day where a cat falls into the shower with him. Haru administers first aid and Sousuke spends the next two weeks refusing to talk to him. They witness this very same cat bellyflopping off of the couch and completely failing to stick any kind of landing whenever it tries to jump anywhere. The cat oftentimes looks embarrassed at its failure to be vaguely catlike. Overall it is a distinctly graceless cat, and it gets the name Butterfly.

After a time, they notice a smaller version of the Rin cat hanging around that tends to give him a good wallop if he’s been crying for too long. This one is a girl, and they name her Kou-chii. Rin cat tends to give her a look after she whaps him that distinctly says ‘That was uncalled for.’ Kou-chii ignores him and curls up for a nap.

Sousuke and Haru are noticing an odd correlation between the cats and their friends. Nagisa declares that this is because the cats are awesome and so are their friends. Then he wants to know which cat is his namesake. Gisa is an unruly tortoiseshell with huge greenish yellow eyes that bounces around everywhere. He climbs everything and chases everything, and Sousuke and Haru are horrified the one time that Gisa manages to partake in some catnip (coincidentally, this is the only thing that little Ai shows fear of). He is often the only participant (or the leader) of what Haru calls ‘kitten raceway’ that extends from one end of the apartment to the other and consists of numerous laps. He falls asleep in the dumbest positions, like with his head in Haru’s shoe and Butt in Sousuke’s, or spread eagle on the kitchen floor or counter. He also tries to perch on people’s heads and shoulders and uses their hair as playthings. He coerces Butterfly into cuddling more often than not. Gisa also tends to be the one cat that is constantly sliding into walls and furniture and even people because he is running too fast to stop before pummeling into surfaces.

One day Haru is traveling home when he happens upon a gorgeous sleek black cat that has a minor leg injury. He scoops it up and brings it home and calls on Makoto to help him to make sure he patches it up properly. Suke is quiet, and one of the calmest cats, and even tries to get the other cats to behave with a fierce stare that only particularly works when the receiving cat gets tired and decides to take a nap.

Then there’s the pure white cat that tends to sleep anywhere water normally is, like in the shower. He also tends to sleep on top of Sousuke’s old Samezuka jacket, and all his dark hoodies. Sousuke knows he does it completely on purpose, and he says that he hates this cat the most. (He lies.) He names it Sunshine. Haru understands and appreciates the gesture.

Makoto has a tendency to drop random kittens and cats off at Haru and Sousuke’s place when he finds them. He’ll leave them on the porch, in the backyard, and sometimes even in the front entryway. He knows that they will all follow the smell of cat food into the kitchen and get taken care of there. Sousuke runs on autopilot in the mornings and fills the bowl up. Haru smiles at him, and Sousuke is too sleepy to care that he is feeding the animals he claims that he doesn’t like at all. He glances at Haru and asks what he’s looking at when Sousuke travels along the kitchen to the coffee maker, scritching cats along the way.

There’s one cat that always shows up with at least one other cat following it. It is the pied piper of the cats. This is Fluffball, and he is the only cat to consistently sleep in the random cat bed in the apartment, and seems to make it a point to not sleep on anything he shouldn’t, like clothes or towels. He also usually encourages the other cats to eat first. Occasionally, though, Fluff will get in just the right kind of mood where he wants Haru to pay more attention to him, and instead of mewling like Rin, he just stares and Haru and very slowly pushes Haru’s sketchbook off the table. Haru tries his very hardest to sound menacing and serious when he says “Fluffball. Don’t you dare.” (It doesn’t work very well.) This usually causes great glee and much mirthful laughing from Sousuke.

Every one of their friends is pretty pleased with their cat counterparts, except of course for Rin. Nagisa loves his cat and would love to take him home with him. Momo and Little Momo hunt for beetles together constantly. At first Ai is a little upset that they picked the tiniest kitten to be named after him, until Haru passes by and says “That was the one that chased the Doberman down the street.” and Ai is proud that his kitten is tiny AND fierce. Rei is a little embarrassed, but he can see the humor in Butterfly and appreciates the thought anyway.

One afternoon Rin finally figures out that one of the cats is named after him. He’s in the front entryway of the apartment, and the little Rin cat is mewling as usual. Rin tries to pick him up and comfort him, but Rin-cat is having none of that. (None of the cats particularly like Rin.) He swipes at Rin and cries louder. Both Sousuke and Haru yell from other rooms “Quiet down, Rin.” Rin is confused. Not only has he made no noise, but they don’t even know that he’s there yet, he’s only just let himself in. Rin walks into the living room all grouchy and irritated, and finds Sousuke there on the couch grinning at him. Haru says, “Calm down, Rin, have some mackerel.” Rin snaps toward the kitchen that he doesn’t want any damn mackerel. Haru comes out and stares at him, simply tells Rin, “I wasn’t talking to you.” Tiny Rin cat runs across the house and climbs up onto Haru’s shoulder. Rin is glaring at everyone, especially the cat. Sousuke is just barely restraining himself from laughing his ass off. Haru is still talking to the kitten, “There, there, Rin.” The kitten purrs even louder from his perch. Rin upgrades from glaring to scowling. Sousuke starts laughing so hard he falls off the couch. This startles Mittens, who is sitting on the bookshelf. Macky runs in and plops himself on Sousuke’s chest. Saba is using the patented cat glare to judge them all from on top of the tv. Rin tries to sit on the couch and nearly loses his butt to the cat he accidently almost sits on. Koko is highly offended that he tried to sit on her. (She likes him even less after that incident.)

Rin is now highly suspicious and is wondering just how many cats are in this place. He wants to know why Sousuke is not only okay with the cats around, but one is actually sitting on him. Who is this alien and what happened to his best friend? Rin exclaims, “What’s going on? There’s like 15 cats in here.”

Sousuke just responds, “There’s only 10 today.”

Rin is even more baffled. “ONLY 10? TODAY?”

Haru enters from the kitchen again, and just says “No, it’s 11. You didn’t see the one in the bathroom sink?” Sousuke just shrugs, like, ‘what can you do?’

After a while Rin gets used to the constant flux of cats and addresses the more important issue. “Why that cat?” he whines. As he says it Rin cat mewls. Rin freezes. That’s not cool. He can see why they picked that cat, even if he doesn’t like it. He just wants to know why they couldn’t pick a cooler feature of his.

“All cats have sharp teeth, Rin, so we couldn’t pick that.” Haru deadpans. Sousuke starts dying in laughter.

“Well, Rin, I haven’t found a cat that snores like you, either.” Sousuke gets out between laughs. Haru snorts. Rin is completely unamused. Rin cat mewls again since no one is paying him any attention. This does nothing to dispel the laughter.

“Shut up, cat, they’re paying attention to me right now. Go find a corner to pout in or something.” Rin waves the cat away. Sousuke is crying in laughter, actual tears dripping down his face laughing. Predictably, the cat ignores Rin. Then proceeds to mewl loudly whenever Rin tries to talk. Rin needs new friends. Sousuke is going to need a hospital from laughing too hard at this point. Rin finally gives up and checks the couch before flopping on until someone pays the cat attention. Rin cat adamantly refuses to be coddled by Rin.

One day Rin falls asleep on the couch and awakes with a quiet sleeping cat on his lap. His life is so unfair. He just wants to love the cats like everyone else, but the only time they go to him is if he’s completely asleep. When he lifts his hand to stroke it, it immediately vacates it’s spot. He wants to know how Sousuke can do it when he doesn’t even (supposedly) like cats.


	2. The Story of Sou and Macky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/87/33/31/873331c667847958efc1f0a441bfbdb0.jpg) is what Macky and Saba look like.

Sousuke is lying on the couch reading a book when a small noise comes from the floor below the couch. He ignores it and continues reading until he hears a low, insistent meow. He pauses in his reading and glances down at the floor to see one of the twins, a sleek dark gray cat that has been dubbed Macky.

Macky is not alone. Lying in front of his feet is a small mottled brownish lump that, for a moment, Sousuke can’t identify. He snaps his book shut, sits up, and places his book on the couch next to him. He cautiously looks down again to the cat now sitting proudly between his feet. Between its feet is the brown lump, which Sousuke can now tell is something covered in mangled feathers.

A bird. The cat has brought Sousuke a dead bird. The cat’s little face looks between him and the offering, then meows a quiet meow. Sousuke is partially horrified and partially smitten with how proud the cat looks at having provided for him.

Feeling Sousuke’s apprehension, Haru pokes his head out of the kitchen to see what Sousuke is up to. Sousuke makes eye contact for a brief second and makes a muted hand gesture toward the waiting cat. Haru shrugs his shoulders, and satisfied that nothing is too out of place, returns to the kitchen.

Sousuke sighs. Macky is still staring at him and waiting for some kind of response, though Sousuke isn’t sure what kind of response to give. Resignedly, he slowly reaches out and strokes the cat from head to tail, and says, “Good job, cat.”

The cat looks up in unrestrained delight, stands up, rubs once against Sousuke’s leg, and retreats to somewhere else in the house to do something else, probably take a nap. Sousuke stares at the dead sparrow at his feet again for a second before scooping it up and taking it into the kitchen to dispose of it.

And that is the story of how Sousuke was won over by the proud little feline face that wanted to provide for its master.


	3. Sunshine and the (Questionable) Murder Attempt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](http://www.rustsragdolls.com/Dwight.JPG) is what Sunshine looks like.

Everyone is asleep in the dark of early morning when Sousuke is unceremoniously thrust from a particularly pleasant dream by an awful tightening of his throat and the glancing scrape of claws. His eyes spring open only to be blinded by pure white fur, which can only belong to one particularly annoying feline. Sunshine, Sousuke thinks to himself, is an asshole of a cat.

Taking stock of the situation leaves Sousuke with an entirely too alarmed looking cat, and a long forepaw stretched just barely across Sousuke’s throat where the cat is tenaciously balanced with his back paws, claws included, slightly scraping the skin on the other side of his neck. As best as Sousuke can guess, Sunshine was trying to curl up as close to his face as possible, probably to try and suffocate him, he thinks wryly.

He figures it must be the cat’s highly annoying proclivity to sleeping on anything of Sousuke’s that white fur will show up dreadfully on that possessed the cat to try to mar Sousuke’s dark blue pillowcase, although he can’t determine why it had to be this particular time, especially when his old Samezuka jacket is still draped over the seat of the desk chair.

To his credit, Sunshine very gently removes his claws from their perch within millimeters of Sousuke’s skin, in an act that seems very tentative and careful, like the cat is truly trying his very best to ensure that he doesn’t actually cause Sousuke any additional pain to the accidental almost scraping that awoke him.

He backs up a bit, just beyond Sousuke’s shoulder, and gives Sousuke an indecipherable look before he bends his little head down and gently gives the slightly red skin of Sousuke’s neck a tiny lick, as if to kiss it better, before he curls up in a furry ball in the crook made by Sousuke’s neck and shoulder.

Sousuke is at this moment a bit surprised, especially by the loving little lick, but decides that he is too sleepy to bother thinking too much of it. It’s only a cat, anyway, and Sousuke figures that he could have tried suffocating him anytime, so he might as well just go back to sleep. Plus Sunshine is warm against his body, and then he starts purring, putting himself and Sousuke quickly back to sleep.


	4. Gisa and the Fridge Incident

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](https://40.media.tumblr.com/f7c0bd3144f20de72e73a947564c8e64/tumblr_mzol5xSdAd1qewacoo1_500.jpg) is what Gisa looks like.

Gisa is a very weird cat. That’s pretty much the only way that Sousuke can really describe him. Much like the person he was named after, the cat has what seems to be a neverending supply of crazy energy. Also like his human counterpart, Gisa has a number of terrible habits. Besides running across the house like a cat possessed, which Haru affectionately refers to as “kitten raceway”, Gisa also has the tendency to sneak into Sousuke’s underwear drawer for his morning catnaps.

Butterfly has mostly been the recipient of Gisa’s highly demanding cuddle sessions, although most of the other available cats have been coerced at some point in time or another. Gisa has been seen multiple times hanging half off of the couch while napping, and it seems to be a miracle that he hasn’t yet completely fallen off. He also has a (so far) death defying habit of sprawling out over as much floor space as catly possible, during which Sousuke has to make an extreme effort to not pancake the cat under his feet.

Both Sousuke and Haru and even their friends have caught the cat playing in the kitchen sink, and, occasionally, dipping his paws into the open toilet. He also tramples over the counters, giving absolutely no care to the things that he knocks off of them as he goes. It’s lucky that they keep the tea and coffee and sugar in very well sealed containers, as Gisa has knocked them down time and time again, and if they had to purchase them again every time they would be broke as well as unendingly thirsty.

The thing that baffled Sousuke the most about Gisa was the way he would slink into the fridge at the first opportunity available. Every time the fridge opened, the cat was there, worming his way onto one of the shelves, or into a slightly open crisper drawer. Haru, apparently seeing absolutely nothing wrong with a cat wanting to take a nap inside the fridge, would just close the door until Sousuke scolded him. At that point all Sousuke received was a brief look and shrug of the shoulders before he moved in to open the door himself and dig the cat back out.

One exceeding hot summer day, Sousuke finished tending to some laundry and went back into the house to get a well deserved cold drink. He entered the kitchen to find the fridge door flung wide open, with Haru and Gisa curled up together on the floor in front of it, obviously taking advantage of the cooled breeze to partake in an afternoon nap. And while Sousuke has the thought that at least this way he doesn’t have to worry about Haru drowning himself in a cool naptime bath, he does grow a concern for what promises to be a rapidly rising electric bill.

Sousuke leans over the small cuddlepile to get himself a cool drink like he had intended, then gently nudges Haru over so he can close the fridge door before he retires to the couch to take a nap in a civilized human way. When he gets there he takes note of Koko curled on one end, and so that he doesn’t have to move her, quietly props his feet on the armrest above her tiny furry body and lays down.

He wakes a few hours later to a heavy weight on his chest, much heavier than the bird catching Macky, and finds Haru had traded in the kitchen floor for Sousuke instead. Haru twitches only slightly, mostly due to the fact that he is also being slept on, with Gisa stretched out along his back, and mutters to Sousuke about how it’s too warm. Sousuke looks at him with a tired but incredulous look before he responds “Then why are on sleeping on me?”

They both blink at each other for a second, Gisa flicks his tail once in front of Haru’s nose, and they both let out a tiny huff of laughter before closing their eyes and going back to sleep.


	5. Blacky and His (Unlikely) Favorite Human

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](http://www.sciencebuddies.org/Files/3343/5/MamBio_img038.jpg) is what Blacky looks like.

At first Rin is jealous of Haru, and even of Sousuke, who doesn’t seem to appreciate the gift given to him at all. He is still a little embarrassed and a little annoyed that Haru had managed to so slyly dig the pertinent cat related information about Sousuke out of him in a way he he didn’t even notice, but mostly now he was jealous.

Everyone knew that there was a cat named after or for each of them. Most of them found it amusing, or cute, or in Rei’s case, a little embarrassing but thoughtful. But Rin was not pleased in general. Not only was his namesake named for one of Rin’s more pitiful features (he knew he could be a bit of a crybaby), but the darn cat wouldn’t even let him pet it!

The cat version of Rin was much more of a crybaby than he was, and frequently used its pitiful face and cat charm to weasel attention out of anyone and everyone it could, except for Rin himself. The first time Rin tried to comfort it, which was coincidentally the first time he learned the cat’s name, left Rin frustrated and Sousuke dying of laughter while Haru looked on in rampant amusement.

Rin (the cat) swiped his tiny little claws at Rin the first time they met, and absolutely refuses to accept Rin’s affections in any way at all. Most of the cats that traipsed through Sousuke and Haru’s place were much the same, in that none of them had any particular penchant for entertaining Rin’s desire in showing them any kind of love. If Rin was lucky, a cat would use him as a bed after he fell asleep on the couch, but they always left immediately after he woke, as if they could sense him wanting to pet them even through their sleepiness.

There’s one cat, though. The demon of hell personified, at least that’s how Rin feels. These cats have Sousuke laughing at him an awful lot. The first time he met this particular ball of evil fur, he was trying to figure out which of the two cats was named which name. This was when Haru had mentioned that he had taken in an injured cat that he had named after Sousuke, and Rin was curious to see which of the four mostly permanent cats it was.

Of course, neither of the fools would do anything but tell him the names of the cats, and not which cat belonged to which name. Ai was an easy one, since everyone knew the tiny fierce gray fluffball was named for their equally tiny fierce gray haired friend of the same name. Sunshine wasn’t a hard one to figure out either, since Sousuke had a tendency to angrily mutter about “that damn asshole cat with his white fur all over my black clothes” at a frequent rate.

So that left Suke and Blacky. One was a gorgeous sleek black cat with incredibly blue eyes, and the other was a cat with cream spotted black fur that had light green eyes. As Rin stood there with both cats in front of him, he pointed to the all black one and said decisively, “Blacky.”

Sousuke snorted as Haru looked up from his sketchbook and raised an eyebrow at Rin. “No.” Haru said. The cat he pointed to looked highly offended at Rin’s choice. Honestly, the cat had a face on as if it wished it could talk so it could tell Rin how dumb he was. Which, Rin thought, was so alike Sousuke he was surprised he didn’t see it sooner.

“So, that’s Suke?” Rin asked, dropping his hand to his side. He glances down to the cat still in front of his feet. “Then this one must be Blacky.”

At his name, the cat reaches up with his front paws and delicately hooks his claws in the front of Rin’s pants. With a tiny gleeful meow, Blacky attempts to climb Rin in an effort to apparently get closer to the hands that can pet him. This is exactly the opposite of how the cats usually react to Rin, and it is not only a little confusing. Well, he is used to claws. But they usually are trying to get Rin away, not trying to pull him closer.

Rin can hear Sousuke laughing in the background, and he’s sure that if Haru even cares at all, that he is getting a kick out of the highly confused expression on Rin’s face. The cat continues to try and climb his way up Rin’s pants to have attention paid to him. Rin can feel the claws dig into his leg, and he flinches, although this does not deter the cat at all. He tries to ignore Sousuke’s almost breathless giggling while he leans down to gently pat the cat’s head and try to detach him without further ruining his jeans.

The action is only partially successful. The cat enjoys the petting but immediately demands more, using his leverage on Rin’s leg to further push his head into Rin’s hand, while simultaneously inching higher and deterring Rin’s attempt to detach him. Eventually Rin looks pleadingly up at Sousuke and Haru, which only causes Sousuke to laugh again, while Haru grudgingly gets up and gently removes Blacky from his perch. Rin sighs a tiny sigh of relief, while Haru holds the cat up to him.

As Rin looks at Haru curiously, Haru tilts his head and cradles the cat in his arms, as if telling Rin what to do. Rin slowly puts his arms together as if he is going to take a baby, which he hasn’t done since Gou was tiny herself, and Haru lightly places the now purring cat into Rin’s waiting arms. Rin knows he has an entirely too stupid look on his face, but he can’t help it. Most of the time the cats refuse to be anywhere near him.

He goes to sit on the couch, but Sousuke stops him and points at his pants, which have tiny pinpricks of blood seeping through. “Off.”

Rin looks up at him and squints. “What.”

“Take them off.”

“No. I’m busy, leave me alone.”

Sousuke smiles. “Rin, if you don’t want to do it, I will.”

Rin scoffs and resumes petting the cat with one hand while he cradles it in the other arm. He notices Haru leaving the living room, but doesn’t really make an effort to figure out why. Sousuke rises from the couch and approaches Rin, far too close for comfort. Then he attempts to unbutton Rin’s pants himself, like he said he would. Rin squawks and almost drops the cat.

“Alright, alright! I’ll do it myself, lemme go!” He gently puts the cat on the couch and finishes what Sousuke started while he grumbles to himself. Sousuke looks entirely too smug. Haru returns from the other room with bandaids and what looks like a tiny sewing kit. He hands the bandaids to Sousuke while he takes Rin’s pants and plops gently on one end of the couch to inspect them.

Sousuke takes the bandaids and nudges Rin down into a chair, while he starts to unwrap the first of a number of bandaids that he not so lightly slaps onto the tiny bleeding marks on Rin’s skin. Rin looks down in mild offense as he sees the bandaids are covered in a variety of fish, sharks, and sparkly butterflies that no doubt came from Nagisa. By the time Sousuke is done, Haru is brandishing Rin’s “fixed” pants at him.

He will never be able to wear these again. What used to be tiny, hardly noticeable pinprick holes are now various tiny patches of mismatching scraps of fabric that consist of Haru’s idea of patching holes. He looks over at Blacky, who gets up and walks over and plops his furry body onto Rin’s underwear clad lap. Then he starts purring. Once again Sousuke is laughing at him. Rin will never be able to live this down. This cat is a demon.


	6. Rin and the Cuddle Solution

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/9b/f0/72/9bf072d00ee5ff7412df8d284d603a13.jpg) is Rin and Kou-chii.

Haru is the kind of person who always needs something to occupy his hands, whether he’s holding a spoon or spatula, absently twirling a pen, gripping the strap of the bag slung over his shoulder, or idly pulling on the tiny threads his fingers brush inside his pockets. Most of the time, he doesn’t even really realize he does it. No one has ever mentioned it, and it isn’t such a thing that anyone is bothered by it, so there’s not really a need for anyone to point it out.

To be honest, the only reason that he figures it out is thanks to the little menace that he and Sousuke instantaneously dubbed ‘Rin’ at the first sound of it’s piteous little cry for attention. He’s still practically a kitten, with his little lithe blackish tan body and ears that might be just a tad too big for his head. Though the cat meows in order to get anyone’s attention (except for the actual Rin, of course) it seems that he has a particular fondness for Haru himself.

At first Rin just meows from whatever room he’s in until someone comes in and pets him, and that seems good enough. Then he starts to actively search out Haru in order to get him specifically to cuddle with him. If Haru is sketching, Rin will climb up on the arm of the couch or chair he’s in and bat at his hand until he scratches behind his ears. If Haru is accosted in the kitchen, he’s usually busy with some sort of cooking utensil, or in some cases, a plate or glass.

After a few situations where Rin has made it a point to try and remove whatever is in Haru’s hands and subsequently in the way of kitty cuddles, Haru starts to realize that there is quite a lot of time where his hands are already busy, even if he really isn’t doing anything. Even when he’s woken up from sleeping, he realizes his hands are usually clutching a pillow or blanket, or even Sousuke’s shirt.

This starts to be a problem for the tiny cat. Since Haru’s always busy with something, even if he’s not actually busy, it means little Rin doesn’t get his often demanded cuddles. While Haru tries to appease him with one handed petting, much like human Rin, the cat wants what it wants and nothing else is good enough.

One day, while Haru is in the kitchen cooking up a bit of extra mackerel as a treat for the cats that are currently in the apartment, Rin shows up at his feet and meows loudly. Haru nods silently to himself and leans down to pat the cat’s head, then continues attending to the fish on the stove. Apparently this is nowhere near enough for the cat, and he meows loudly again, waiting for Haru to lean down and pet him again.

Rin takes advantage of Haru’s closer to the floor stature, and crouches before carefully leaping up on top of Haru’s closest shoulder. Haru jolts up, but the cat has decent balance and manages to stay where he landed just fine. As Haru straightens the rest of the way up, Rin purrs and settles down on Haru’s shoulder in contentment.

The kitten seems even more satisfied with his new perch than he is even when he gets undivided attention and plenty of cuddles, and as long as he doesn’t fall off, then Haru’s got no problem with having his strange little shoulder guest. He hums a little to himself as he continues cooking, flipping the mackerel in the pan.

This turns into an almost everyday occurrence for both Haru and Rin. In the kitchen, on the couch sketching, doing laundry, pretty much anytime the kitten can balance on Haru’s shoulder he does. Haru has adjusted minutely to the new weight that occurs on only one side of his body at a time, and has become quite skilled at maneuvering around with his tiny passenger. He has also developed a habit of murmuring at the kitten under his breath, stroking his fur and praising how well behaved he is.

One afternoon, while Haru is preparing dinner, Sousuke enters the kitchen after doing some basic yard work in search of some cold water, or even iced tea. Haru turns toward him briefly, and Sousuke pauses for a minute with his hand outstretched toward the fridge door. He looks to the pleased cat sitting up on Haru’s left shoulder, and then back at Haru’s face. “What are you doing now?”

Haru looks him in the eye and simply says, “I’m a pirate.” And then turns back to the counter to continue his chopping.

Sousuke is incredulous. He’s knows Haru’s got a deadpan better than even himself, but that was just unexpected. The kitten turns his head and gives Sousuke what he is starting to think is the third most fierce judging face from the inhabitants of this apartment, following himself and Haru as first and second, respectively. He swears that it even looks like Rin has stuck his tiny kitten tongue out at him, but that must just be his imagination, maybe the heat of the outdoors is getting to him. He grabs a bottle of water from the fridge and resolves to go sit down and cool off before he goes crazy.


	7. Butterfly and the Terrible Theory (AKA Why Cats Should Never Do Physics)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](http://ak-hdl.buzzfed.com/static/enhanced/webdr01/2013/4/12/15/anigif_enhanced-buzz-16731-1365793979-10.gif) is Butterfly.

Weekly movie night is a recently dubbed tradition that happens on one night each week when all of the friends gather at Haru and Sousuke’s place to watch movies, eat junk food, be nuisances, and generally just spend friend time together again on a regularly demanded (mostly by Nagisa) basis. They typically rotate who chooses the movies, or in some instances, they have a vote. Voting nights tend to be a little more rowdy than normal, as there is usually some form of cheating or mock fighting.

Usually when everyone is over, the various cats tend to find their own things to do with so much going on. Sunshine typically finds a nice spot to nap in the sink or shower, and Suke usually picks a nice perch from which to stare everybody into submission if he thinks it’s getting too crazy. (It never works.) Ai, however, is a cuddler. He’ll wait until everyone is all settled to find a nice spot to lay in and soak up all the warmth of the people around him. Blacky sticks to Rin like glue. He’s the only cat that gives Rin any attention at all, much to Rin’s chagrin.

The other cats migrate to and from the apartment with more frequency, and decide if they are there what they want to do. By the end of the night, there’s usually a sleepy pile of humans and cats alike lounging across the living room. Gisa in particular can be found cuddled away in one of the various empty bowls laying around the room.

They all tend to have lots and lots of snacks, thanks to Nagisa’s persistence that you can’t possibly watch a movie without at least two flavors of popcorn and various other snacks and candies. Haru and Sousuke’s kitchen is enormously packed with a plentiful variety of refreshments, which everyone is currently packed into the kitchen to retrieve. Haru is in charge of popping the popcorn, the old fashioned way, because “It tastes best that way, Haru-chan!”

The rest of them wander about the kitchen gathering bowls, glasses, drinks, popcorn flavorings, and other little odds and ends needed to make the night enjoyable. Sousuke and Rei get the first batch of finished popcorn, and they fill their individual bowls and pick their own toppings. After that is done, they take their glasses of tea and head out of the kitchen to make more room for the rest of them to do their thing while they set up the tv and everything.

They walk into the living room to a slight breeze due to the slowly rotating ceiling fan. They manage to get a couple of steps in before they notice that Butterfly has successfully climbed to the top of the towering bookcase. He seems to have a concentrated look on his little cat face, and perches at the very edge of the shelf. They don’t have much time to react, since at the instant they realize what’s going on, Butterfly has already commenced the typical cat butt wiggle that precedes a great leap across the room.

With varying looks of shock and horror on the two guys’ faces, they watch as Butterfly arcs through the air towards the closest blade of the rotating fan. To his credit, he does make contact with it, though it certainly does not turn out the way the cat expected. After he hits the fan, he scrabbles a bit to try and get a grip, and then proceeds to fall through the air toward the floor.

Sousuke and Rei watch as Butterfly drops like a stone, and hits the couch and bounces a brief bounce against the cushion before he sits up and licks a paw, as if he had intended to do exactly what they had seen. After the paw is thoroughly licked, he hops off the couch and prances down the hallway with his tail in the air. Sousuke and Rei turn to each other and share a face of ‘what the hell did I just see?’ before Sousuke shakes his head and mutters under his breath, as if he’s done it so many times before, “Fucking Butterfly.”


	8. Fluffball and the Battle for Dominance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](http://i442.photobucket.com/albums/qq147/belgradedailyphoto/fluffycalico.jpg) is Fluffball.

In general, the cats who traipsed through Haru and Sousuke’s apartment were very much the definition of average, quirky cats. They did what they wanted, when they wanted, and how they wanted, with little regard to the humans that actually lived there. The biggest exception was Fluffball.

Fluff was the Makoto of the cats that came to Haru and Sousuke’s place. He always had another cat or two following him, as if he were leading them to where he knew they would be taken care of, and he typically let them get to the food bowl and have their fill before he would eat. He took very special care to only sleep in the cat bed that was left in one of the rooms by one of Haru and Sousuke’s friends, and to never sleep on anything that wasn’t for cats, like clothes or towels.

Overall, Fluffball was the nicest and most polite cat of them all. He behaved well, didn’t make messes, tried to calm down the other cats, and even tempered Gisa’s errant behavior. But Fluffball had a secret. He could be an asshole. But only to one person.

Haru was the unfortunate recipient of Fluffball’s quirky little mood. Once in a while, he got it in his furry little head to accept the most catlike feature of all, and to Haru’s chagrin, he used it well. Haru’s possessions were not safe. Sketchbooks, pens, utensils, anything that Haru used that wouldn’t be broken irreparably was slowly and systematically pushed off of whatever surface it was resting on.

The first time it happened, Haru had been sitting on the floor in front of the couch, with a sketchbook on the table in front of him, and one in his lap. He heard the muffled thump of a cat hopping up on the table, but was too concentrated on his work to bother to see which one it was. He heard a soft tap on the table, but he was trying to get just the right angle on his line, so he hardly glanced up.

He heard the tap a few more times before he heard a slight scraping noise and finally looked up. Fluffball was sitting just next to the sketchbook, and he had one paw on it. He had a look on his face that said that he was waiting for Haru’s attention to focus on him, and then he very, very slowly started pushing the sketchbook towards the edge of the table.

Haru locked eyes with the cat and shook his head. Fluff pushed the book another inch. Haru said quietly, “No.” Predictably, Fluff ignored him. The book moved another inch toward certain doom.

“Fluffball. No.” A slow cat blink and another inch.

“Fluffball. Don’t. You. Dare.” Haru was using his most threatening voice, but it had absolutely zero effect on the cat. Another slow inch. Fluffball blinked once more, lifted his paw, tapped it on the cover of the book, and then swiftly chucked it off the edge of the table to the floor below. The cat did not break the stare that he had been levelling at Haru until Haru looked to the floor where the book lay.

At this point, Fluff stood up, flicked his fluffy tail in Haru’s direction and then proceeded to hop off the table, directly on top of the sketchbook, to Haru’s curse. Then he sauntered off into another room. Sousuke had poked his head in the room at hearing Haru’s admonitions to the cat(which did not sound threatening at all, thanks to the ridiculous name of the cat), and snickered at Haru as he picked his sketchbook back off the floor. Haru leveled an angry glare at Sousuke while he brushed the book off.

These occurrences happened more and more often, when Fluffball was in a “playful” mood. He only did it to Haru, though, and Sousuke got a laugh everytime he heard Haru trying to convince the cat to not do what he was going to do. It never got any more threatening, of course, which just made Sousuke’s day. It was also normal to hear an increasing number of frantic “no”s from whenever Haru was in the apartment.

Fortunately (for Haru), it seems like one other entity has been observing the goings on. Sunshine, after a few weeks of seeing Haru tormented by Fluffball and hearing Sousuke’s reactions to the situations, decides to copy Fluffball. He waits until Sousuke is settled at the table with a nice tall glass of tea while he waits for Haru to bring dinner from the kitchen to the table.

Sunshine hops up onto the table next to Sousuke’s glass and gives him a very concentrated stare.He slowly lifts one pure white paw, and puts it to the side of the glass. Sousuke narrows his eyes at the cat. “Sunshine. Don’t you even dare.”

Sunshine blinks an extra slow blink, then pushes the glass within an inch of the table edge. Sousuke repeats himself with more force, although trying to use a threatening voice while talking to a cat named Sunshine is not any better than trying to talk to one named Fluffball. Sunshine seems to think better of his actions and puts his paw down. Sousuke lets out a brief sigh, and then he hears soft footsteps approaching. Sunshine lifts his other paw, and positions it higher on the glass, and then proceeds to tip the glass over in the opposite direction, so that the drink is instead spilled over the table’s surface.

Haru seems amused, while with his typical deadpan look on his face, he slides a plate of food across to Sousuke, right next to the puddle of tea, while he says possibly the most ridiculous thing Sousuke has ever heard him say. “Don’t be upsetti have some spaghetti.”

Sousuke gives him possibly the most incredulous look that has ever graced his face before he sighs and gets up to clean the mess. The next time Fluffball decides to take advantage of Haru’s possessions, there is a noticeable lack of laughter following the clatter of various objects hitting the floor.


	9. Ai Meets His Match

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](http://img08.deviantart.net/77ff/i/2007/313/5/8/kitten_smokey_by_chell_dogs.jpg) is Ai.

The day they discover and name Ai is the day that Sousuke nearly kills him by squishing him into the shoe that the kitten has unexpectedly claimed as his nap time bed. Sousuke almost doesn’t notice the little fluffball until he’s practically got his foot in the shoe, and he finally realizes that there is something in it. He bends down and scoops up his shoe, and then gently pulls the kitten out of his hiding place. It is seriously the smallest kitten Sousuke has ever seen in his whole life, tiny and fluffy and gray with huge blue eyes.

Even though he nearly squished it to death with his foot, the kitten is not scared of him at all. In fact, he’s the exact opposite of scared, giving Sousuke the cutest (and not at all effective) most threatening glare it can muster, until Sousuke puts him carefully down on the entranceway floor. The kitten gives a little huff, flicks his tiny tail in the air, and trots down the hallway back into the apartment, presumably to find another tiny space to stuff his equally tiny body.

Sousuke and Haru figure that Ai is the runt of his litter, but he certainly does not let that affect his life in any meaningful way, other than using it to fit into ridiculous places. He also, apparently, has exactly zero fear, of anything that either Sousuke or Haru have seen. The other cats don’t avoid Ai, but they know that just because he’s tiny, doesn’t mean he can be bullied or pushed around.

Haru observes a minor altercation at the food bowl one morning, where one of the other cats decides to try and shove little Ai over so it can get in the bowl first, and Ai turns and uses his incredible lung power to hiss the cat straight back three feet. Another time sees Ai getting jostled around the scratching post cat tower, and Ai lets loose a mighty swipe of his little paw and nearly knocks the other cat down from the fourth level of the giant monstrosity.

Sousuke goes out one day to get some groceries, and on the way back he sees this huge, mean looking Doberman running down the street as if the fires of hell itself are on his heels. He doesn’t hear anything, and as he moves to glance down the street in the direction the dog came from, he expects to see something truly menacing, like maybe a pack of 5 year olds, a car swerving off the road, or maybe a gang of rottweilers and pitbulls.

There are no 5 year olds, no cars at all, and no slobbering, vicious other dogs. Just a tiny little gray kitten, running as fast as it’s teeny tiny little wobbly legs can go. At once, Sousuke shakes his head. He wonders to himself if he’s seeing things, and looks again down the street. Nope, that huge dog is being chased by a kitten that is no bigger than one of it’s massive paws. And it is scared.

Haru is wandering around the house, idly cleaning with a cat perched on his shoulder, which is absolutely nothing out of the ordinary at this point. Sousuke pauses on his way into the kitchen to tell him what he saw outside, and hearing a muffled bark, moves to the windows to see what’s going on. The dog is now being pursued in the direction it originally came from, and Sousuke waves Haru over to point it out.

They both stare relatively incredulously as they watch the dog and kitten make a few laps up and down the street before they disappear from sight and don’t come back. They share a look (and even little Rin manages a slightly confused Judgey Face) before they both shrug and go about their business. They figure Ai is just not scared of anything and he likes to prove it.

One day they finally discover the only thing that makes Ai run for cover. To be fair, both Sousuke and Haru (along with at least half the other cats) would make a run for it as well, if it wouldn’t just be seen as encouragement. Unfortunately, somehow Gisa found his way into the catnip. Gisa on catnip was akin to a 6 year old that ate every single piece of Halloween and Easter candy all at the same time. The only entity in range that day that wasn’t absolutely terrified out of their mind, both for themselves and for Gisa, who they were afraid would spontaneously combust, was Nagisa. And, really, that wasn’t really much of a surprise.

It seemed like Gisa had a very specific radar, however, in that he continually managed to get into Ai’s space no matter where Ai ran to or hid. And seeing how tiny Ai is, he can fit in a great variety of places that even slinky sneaky Gisa shouldn’t have been able to follow, but he managed. Sousuke and Haru vowed to never let Gisa near the catnip again, and Ai had to come to terms with the fact that there was something even he was rightly scared of.


	10. Socks and His Propensity for Causing Near Death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](http://www.acfacat.com/images/snowshoe.jpg) is what Socks looks like.

Of the visiting felines to Sousuke and Haru’s apartment, the most dangerous of the bunch is a gorgeous, sleek siamese, with cream colored fur, dark ears and legs, and little white feet that Sousuke so creatively named Socks. (He named the one with dark feet Mittens, to which Haru very elegantly snorted at upon learning.)

Although Socks was beautiful, Sousuke would swear the cat had no preservation instinct at all. Without fail, every time the cat was in the apartment and someone went to the kitchen, no matter who, the cat was there, softly winding his way around the person’s ankles, just barely allowing them to stay on their feet without killing themselves or the cat.

Sousuke was the first victim. Luckily he was only making a salad, but the cat still demanded attention and food, and so he wound his way around Sousuke’s ankles until he was almost bopped by a dropped tomato. At the close call, the cat looked at Sousuke with the most betrayed look on his little cat face, as if he thought that Sousuke had purposely tried dropping a huge heavy fruit on him.

The next incident was when Rin had come over to hang out, and, as he usually did, wanted some sort of snack. He was rummaging through the cabinets when he was starletd by the feel of soft, silky fur against his ankles, especially since all but one of the cats usually avoided him like the plague. He managed to find some chips, and tried very carefully to step over the still winding cat, and almost stepped on one of his little white paws.

Rei came over one night, graciously bringing with him a bag of take out since they were getting home so late, and without fail, Socks manages to find the food bearing person and nearly trip them to death. There must be some sort of 6th sense in this cat not only for when food will appear, but also for almost, but not quite, causing death and destruction. Rei does a spot on impression of Butterfly as he trips and almost falls over the couch.

Nagisa finds it to be almost a sort of game, how many times the cat can wind around his ankles successfully without hurting either one of them or the tray of drinks in his hands. Luckily for everyone involved, no one is hurt, although by the time Nagisa makes it to the other room there may possibly be more drink on the tray than in the glasses.

Even ever patient Makoto almost reaches the end of his patience when navigating the kitchen to pour more cat food during the weekend that Haru and Sousuke are away. He winds up overfilling the bowl while trying to windmill one arm to get his balance back before he drops the entire 32 pound bag of kitty kibbles on his feet, Socks, and little Ai who has already come to eat.

The day that the cat apparently learns is also one of Sousuke’s worst days yet, and he’s not even the one trying to cook. It’s Haru’s night to make dinner, and it is also one of the nights that he is banned from making mackerel, since Sousuke makes it a point that they get other things in their diet. Socks is diligently under Haru’s feet the whole time he is cooking, though Haru seems to have incredible balance (probably from having that kitten on his shoulder constantly) since he hasn’t stepped on a stray paw or tail yet.

Unfortunately for Sousuke, someone’s luck runs out just in the last leg of the situation. Haru manages to cook dinner, and serve it up before he turns and actually fully trips over the cat, while the carefully prepared dinner finds its way slithering down Sousuke’s clean t-shirt from where he was retrieving the nights drinks.

Sousuke blinks at the red, saucy mess on his chest, and then glances down to the floor where the cat is also covered in sauce. He looks up at Haru, who has somehow managed to catch his balance against a counter, dish in one hand, right before Haru opens his mouth. He looks at Sousuke with a blank stare starts to say, “Don’t be upsetti,” before he is shut up with the look that Sousuke gives him.

“Haru, I swear if you finish that sentence…”

Haru gets a twinkle in his eye as he continues talking. “Wear some spaghetti.”

Sousuke is done. He is covered in pasta and sauce and Nanase Haruka thinks he’s the funniest asshole on the planet. He has a cat at his feet that may or may not be as covered in dinner as he is, and he knows that this night is only just beginning it’s terribleness, because somehow both he and that cat have to get clean. Sousuke is SO done.

Socks must learn something about the encounter, because he doesn’t return to Haru and Sousuke’s for almost an entire month. When he finally does, he watches very cautiously and even a little sadly as Sousuke makes himself a huge, tasty sandwich and makes it a point to show that he is not going to share a single, solitary crumb with the cat. As Sousuke sits down, he rubs idly at a scar on his hand, a trophy of successfully bathing a tomato sauce stained Siamese.


	11. Mochi and the Definitely Very Evil Creature

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](http://www.cat-breeds-encyclopedia.com/image-files/norwegianfull.jpg) is what Mochi looks like. [This](http://ecstatic-motion.tumblr.com/post/42486553258/my-cat-brought-us-a-present-today-i-have-never) is the bunny in question.

Sousuke has dealt with so many things. He had a cat fall on him in the shower, he frequently has to deal with gifts of dead birds, one of the cats has a habit of bringing in live beetles and bugs that need to make their way back outside, and he has been covered in pasta because one cat tripped Haru at dinner time. He has to listen to one kitten cry bloody murder whenever anyone isn’t paying him attention, and another cat stares him down as he tries to watch tv. Sunshine purposely gets his fur all over any of Sousuke’s clothes that aren’t pure white, and Blacky has a proclivity to using his claws way too much on people’s limbs.

Sousuke deals with a lot. He does not want to deal with this latest development. He absolutely refuses. While Mochi is the sweetest looking beautiful fluffy girl, Sousuke knows that below that gorgeousness, there may possibly be the devil. Just like Haru, he muses. All that mischievousness covered up by a face that looks like it is just as innocent as anything. Sousuke knows the truth, though.

Mochi has started a terrible, terrible habit. He could swear she does it on purpose, because it seems to happen only if he is around. They are used to frequent furry visitors, and even some feathered and insect ones as well, but this particular visitor is not willingly there. Sousuke can agreed with that sentiment. He doesn’t want it there, either.

It is possibly the most evil bunny rabbit Sousuke has ever seen. Mochi has brought it into the apartment more than once. The first time, he found her curled around it where she was lying on the floor. He almost didn’t realize there was anything there besides her long, silky fur. But there it was, sitting next to her belly, with a look on its face that made Sousuke glad that looks couldn’t kill.

Sousuke is not afraid of the rabbit. He just has to deal with so much other cat related stuff that he doesn’t want to deal with this too. He explains as much to Haru, though by the look on his face, Haru doesn’t buy it at all. Sousuke glances at the table, where there is a tiny little plastic cage housing an equally tiny, but very very malicious looking bunny, along with some lettuce and a carrot that it refuses to eat.

It just sits there and stares out in anger. Sousuke wonders if the bunny is like this all the time, or if it’s just because it’s locked in a plastic box in some random apartment who knows how far from it’s real home. Mochi somehow manages to find this same bunny every time, Sousuke knows it, because he doesn’t think that there can be more than one bunny that looks as if it came out of bunny hell.

He nudges at where Haru is plopped in front of the table where the evil bunny is contained, for the moment, and tries to get him to get up and get rid of the damn thing already. “Haru. Take it away.”

Haru hums idly, still sketching away in his notebook, as he pretty much ignores Sousuke. “Why, Sousuke, are you scared of Sir Fluffybutt?”

Sousuke snorts. “No. I’m tired of having to take care of these things. It’s your turn. And for fuck’s sake, don’t name it.”

Haru finally gets up, and smushes into Sousuke’s side while gracefully shoving his notebook into Sousuke’s face. “Are you sure you’re not scared of Mr Fluffypants?”

“I’m not. And that name is not any better. Get rid of it, already.”

Haru hums again and gets up. He picks up the little cage and mutters to the bunny as he walks out of the room. “Hmm, we’ll see you again soon, huh, Prince Fluffball.”

Unfortunately, they do see it again. Repeatedly. Sousuke takes to attempting to being “busy” in other rooms until Haru lets it loose again outside. But he’s not scared of it. Even though it is an almost positively evil creature. (Haru makes up a new name or two every time the bunny winds up back in the apartment, each more and more ridiculous than the last.)


	12. Koko and the Comfy Couch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](http://blog.builddirect.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/sleeping-cat-sofa.jpg) is what Koko looks like.

The one thing that Sousuke had in common with the cats that frequented their apartment was that they all loved naps. Some cats more than others, of course. Gisa only ever seemed to settle down for a nap when he was completely done being a general nuisance. Koko was a napper. And she had one single spot that she liked. On one end of the couch was a sand colored blanket that he and Haru had purchased during a shopping trip to buy more things for their new apartment. They both loved it, the color and the texture, and it found a home very quickly on the couch, where it permanently resides.

This is also where Koko almost permanently resides, laying on top of a blanket that is almost her exact color. At first this is a bit of an issue, as she blends in so well that no one could really tell she was there. Rin almost lost his ass one day as he almost squished her while trying to plop on the couch like the drama queen he was. Koko did not forget that, either. Rin was practically her nemesis.

But Sousuke could appreciate a cat that naps. After a while it was easy to navigate around Koko, since she was always in the same spot, and Sousuke fell into a habit of napping on the couch with his feet on the arm. This gave Koko a tiny little sort of fort space under his legs, and they both got to nap fairly comfortably without really inconveniencing the other.

Well, except when Haru decided that the comfiest place for him to nap was on top of Sousuke. Then it got a bit uncomfortable. Haru had a habit of curling up on his chest, which was just fine and dandy for Koko, since he didn’t bother his feet. And then somehow one (or more) of the other cats decided that Haru was the best place for a nap, and Sousuke was suddenly covered in Haru and various furballs when he awoke.

He considers that this is not the worst thing he’s been through, what with bugs and birds and bunnies and various other disasters, scratches and scars and spaghetti. Being a bit too warm after a glorious nap really isn’t very high on his list of things to complain about. Plus everyone involved is happy, and you really can’t say anything against an apartment full of happiness.

Sousuke could use more of these calm, lazy days, rather than the hectic ones of chasing cats around and dealing with all sorts of stress inducing things. Still on the couch below his feet, Koko lifts herself up just enough to rub against his ankles, then turns in a circle and settles back down to drift back to sleep. Sousuke finds himself wrapping his arms a little more around Haru and then doing the same.


	13. Kou-chii the Queen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/9b/f0/72/9bf072d00ee5ff7412df8d284d603a13.jpg) is Rin and Kou-chii.

One day, they notice Rin has a familiar looking little tagalong with him. This kitten looks just like him, though a bit smaller, and even a bit more dainty, like she knows she is a lady and treats herself with the appropriate respect and elegance. Kou-chii is just as cute as Rin, if not cuter, and much less annoying. It is also extremely satisfying to watch her wallop Rin for crying like a baby constantly.

Kou-chii is pretty chill in general. She doesn’t cry like her brother, and she is well behaved, unlike Gisa, and doesn’t try to kill any of them like Socks. She doesn’t bring creatures in the house, whether dead (like Macky) or alive (like Mochi). She does cat things, like normal cats, napping around the house, and eating when she feels like it, and not causing any particular notice to herself.

One day she and Rin wander into the apartment, and as has become his habit, Rin finds Haru and hops up onto his shoulder and settles down. Kou-chii follows him up to just before Rin pounces, and sits on the floor and watches him get comfortable on his perch. Haru pets her on the head and lifts her into his arms before he stands fully back up, and sees Sousuke looking at him with an eyebrow raised.

Haru walks over to where Sousuke is standing, gently lifts Kou-chii, and deposits her on Sousuke’s good shoulder. She wobbles a second before getting her balance and settling down as if nothing is out of the ordinary, and Sousuke just looks at Haru questioningly.

Haru growls a little under his breath, a rough little ‘arrr’ before he continues, “Will you be my co-pirate?” He asks before he wanders off to do whatever it was he was going to do before he got accosted by his little shoulder cat.

Sousuke looks briefly at the kitten on his shoulder, and then shakes a little in laughter at Haru and his (terrible) sense of humor, before he mutters a quiet “Why the hell not.” that Haru may or may not hear as he leaves the room.


	14. Mittens and the Tendency to Dunk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](http://purrfectcatbreeds.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/siamese51.jpg) is what Mittens looks like.

There was one thing that the human inhabitants and visitors of the apartment could not get used to. It was easy to become aware of the cats and even their individual traits and habits. They could go around weird napping spots, and got used to random meowing. Cats came out of weird places, and they had to develop a special sort of balance in order to not trip on anyone, particularly Gisa, who ran around without any thought at all.

But there was one cat habit that they still haven’t gotten used to yet. Mittens had a very curious disposition, and had a habit of sticking his limbs into anything liquid to figure out what it was and if he liked it. This resulted in a lot of spills, but also drinks and other liquids with mysteriously appearing cat hair in them.

If a glass was too skinny to allow him to stick his head in, then he’d take a delicate black tipped paw and use that to test the liquid in question instead. Hot drinks, cold drinks, soup, a pan of soapy bubbles, the toilet, the fish tank, if it had any sort of viscous material in it, Mittens had tested it with either nose or paw.

Besides the cat hair found floating in whatever it was after Mittens had his investigation, another little issue was the wet spots and paw prints trailed away afterward. It became so common that Sousuke and Haru had to go out and buy special coasters and glass covers so that they could attempt to protect their drinks.

The culmination of this exploratory adventure occurs when there are guests over the apartment, and Rei is the unlucky victim of Mittens absolutely needing to know what he was drinking. Being the kind of person he was, Rei wasn’t really opposed to the cat being curious, after all, that’s what cats were, and far be it for him to be the one to deny someone (even a cat) their research. Unfortunately, Rei was also drinking hot tea, and upon sniffing the surface, the cat backed off so fast that the cup tipped over right into Rei’s unsuspecting lap.

A brief yelp from Rei brought the others into the room to see a hopping and dripping Rei, and a scared out of his wits Mittens. Luckily Rei’s pants absorbed most of the heat from the tea before it hit his legs, but it was still plenty warm, and Rei was made to sit for the remainder of the night in a pair of slightly misfitting pants borrowed from Haru with a conveniently frozen icepack on his lap.

Mittens has learned that sticking his face into every available surface is a Very Bad Idea, and Rei has learned that perhaps even cats need to be restricted in certain situations, regardless of their level of curiosity and his love of learning and new experiences.


	15. Little Momo and the Squirrel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](https://assets.rbl.ms/572255/980x.jpg) is Little Momo and his big brother Juroo.

Apparently the cats and bunnies around Haru and Sousuke’s apartment are not the only creatures that have possibly evil dispositions. Little Momo finds this out the hard way one day, while foraging for beetles somewhere behind the building. The beetles tend to hang around the bottoms of the trees, and this, unfortunately for Little Momo, is also where the neighborhood squirrels hide their stores of nuts.

Squirrels are very possessive. They can also be extraordinarily scary when they want to be. They usually ignore Momo, or at the very least only watch him carefully from afar, but this time the squirrel in question either doesn’t realize that the cat is not a threat to his nuts, or he doesn’t care.

Little Momo has just about sniffed out his latest plaything when a positively rabid ball of grayish brown fur comes barrelling out of the nearest tree like Satan himself has lit the fires of hell on the creature’s tail, heading straight for the poor unsuspecting cat. He gets about a second before he realizes that he should probably start running, and proceeds to tear for the apartment at astounding speeds, with the crazy squirrel practically on his tail.

Little Momo takes off like a shot across the greenery between the trees and the apartment where the former members of the Samezuka swim team are spread out across Haru and Sousuke’s living room. He nearly rams face first into the edge of the door frame as he zooms into the apartment in his haste to escape from the apparently demon possessed rodent pursuing him, and just barely manages to make it in without spraining something in his little kitty body.

He flies in through the apartment at top speed, only stopping when he tries to leap the couch and winds up smacking into a yellow shirted chest and flops down into the unsuspecting someone’s lap. This someone is the human Momo, and he is just as, if not more, surprised as the cat version when he sees the terrifying squirrel barreling straight for them.

Luckily for the Momo’s, Rin emerges from another room in a sparkly glimmer thanks to the play of sunlight on the (presumably stolen from his sister) rhinestone studded shirt that he wears. He apparently startles the squirrel enough that he stops, takes one look at Rin and his open mouth of sharp teeth, and books it back to the trees behind the apartment, giving up the chase on the unfortunate cat.

Little Momo removed his claws from the legs of the Momo whose lap he still perched in, and then hopped down to the floor. He looked up at Rin, gave his ankle a full body rub, and then proceeded to vault himself out of the nearest open window to get back outside. Momo and Rin exchanged slightly confused looks, and then Rin very carefully plopped on the couch, making sure to not almost squish Koko (again).

About an hour later, in the midst of a conversation about who knows what, Little Momo struts into the room with something clenched firmly in his little jaw, and walks right up to Rin, and then deposits his precious cargo into Rin’s lap. It is pretty much the grossest, slimiest cat drooled on bug ever, and Rin is Not Amused. He may or may not even yelp a little, not that he would admit it either way.

Everyone looks over at him in various shades of confusion and amusement. Rin quickly brushes the bug off his lap as Little Momo leaves the room. Unfortunately for Rin, this is not the last he sees of the cat. Little Momo proceeds to bring him a new bug every 15 minutes or so, looking up at him in pride and gratitude before he trots out to go find another present for his savior.

Rin has taken to throwing pleading looks at Sousuke, who laughs a little more every time the cat comes back in. “Sousuke, help.” He whines.

Sousuke shakes his head and laughs some more. “Looks like he’s just trying to thank his knight in shining tanktop.”

Rin scoffs. “He’s giving me nasty bugs. Make it stop.”

“At least they’re not dead birds. You’re on your own.”

“Haruuuuuuu, make the cat stop.”

Haru snorts at Rin. “You came in your shiny shirt and saved him. You’re his hero, Rinrin.”

Little Momo does not stop bringing Rin bugs. They get progressively grosser as he goes. No one will help him get rid of them either. Sousuke has to deal with dead birds, he refuses to deal with someone else’s bugs. By the time they get ready to leave, Rin has a huge pile of bugs in his lap, and his shiny studded shirt (that everyone keeps making fun of) has dirt and cat spit on it. He is entirely frustrated that the only cats that like him are the ones that liberally use bugs and claws. He did not sign up for this.


	16. Saba and the Mackerel War

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/87/33/31/873331c667847958efc1f0a441bfbdb0.jpg) is Macky and Saba.

Haru was mortally offended. How could a cat dislike fish? Especially the best kind of fish. It was perfectly cooked, wonderfully seasoned, just right. Why wouldn’t this cat accept his goodwill and eat the fish that he could have eaten himself, but instead offered to the cat out of the goodness of his heart? And to top it off, it was the cat that was named for the very fish in question.

Saba did not like mackerel. This was an impossible thing for Haru to wrap his mind around. He stood in the kitchen, the cat sitting on the table, with a small plate of mackerel in front of him. Saba had sniffed the fish, had taken a bit in his mouth, even, but then promptly spat it back onto the plate. Then he sat there, and stared at Haru.

Haru would not relent. He would not let this cat besmirch his good will and his favorite dish in the whole world. Sousuke walked in from another room. “Haru? What’s going on?”

“Saba.”

“Saba, what?”

“Saba doesn’t like mackerel. He spit it out.”

“Is that all? I thought something serious was upsetting you.”

“This IS serious, Sousuke.”

Sousuke sighed. There were battles he could win, with perseverance and possibly terrible complications, including Haru being an absolute pouty asshole for ages, but he had to choose which of those battles was worth the effort, and this was not one of them. “Alright then. Give me a shout if you need me.”

Sousuke was not going to get involved in whatever was going to happen here. He’d been meaning to reorganize the closet in the bedroom. This was the perfect opportunity to get that done and avoid the weirdness in the kitchen.

Two hours later and Sousuke finally going back to the kitchen. Haru and Saba were in the exact same positions as when he left. Apparently they were having a staredown that neither of them was going to give up on. Sousuke just shakes his head and walks around Haru to get to the fridge. He could tell, after a long time of dealing with Haru, that he was not going to move until he got his way, and at this point that would leave them standing in the kitchen til the wee hours of the night, with no dinner for anyone, unless Sousuke made it now.

He was most definitely not making mackerel, or any sort of fish in general. He still had occasional nightmares about being covered in spaghetti and the terror that came with washing it off of a squirming, clawing mess of a pasta covered cat, so he avoided that as well. Pork. Pork was safe. He’d make pork tonkatsu, with rice. A nice, safe, friendly dish. Unlikely to start any cat wars.

“Haru.” He figured he’d try once more before going about his business. Haru merely pouted and huffed at him as he continued to stare at the gray cat perched on the table. “Okay, then.” Then he proceeded to move around Haru, quite literally, to access all he needed to get cooking. He was used to this. Hopefully someone would win this battle by the time he was done cooking, or he’d just leave them both there as long as they wanted and go eat by himself.

It took him a while to cook, what with having to make the rice, and then cut and season and bread the pork before cooking it. He took his time at it as well, and anytime he had to move around Haru he did so without so much as a sound. He had the dishes set out and ready, and put the tea on as well. Just when the pork was almost done, he heard a tiny, tiny sigh from behind him.

He turned, very quietly, to see that Saba had finally given up the staring contest, at least. He now sat with his tiny furry head on his equally tiny furry paws, still gazing at Haru, but no longer in defiance and challenge. Haru looked (and felt, he noticed now) suddenly smug. Sousuke was just glad that dinner wouldn’t get cold while he waited for them to get done.


	17. Pearl and the Grossest Thing Ever (No, Seriously, It Really, Really Is)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](http://euroburmese.com/cream.jpg) is Pearl.

They have been through a lot of stuff since the cats started frequenting the apartment. There have been claws and teeth, fur over every available surface, cats falling off of various surfaces. They have found cats in sinks, showers, drawers, and even the fridge. They’ve had them bring in creatures in varying states of life and death, with dispositions from harmless to decidedly evil.

This is something that neither Sousuke nor Haru were prepared for. It is a normal cat thing, and really, in the scheme of things they’ve dealt with since the furry visitors started frequenting, it is not actually the worst thing that has happened. That does not make it any less gross and disturbing.

Hairballs are not something that anyone can handle. One morning finds Sousuke wondering why the hell the floor next to his bed (and, consequently, his foot, which landed in it) is covered in a wet spot, and when he looks blearily down and sees the horrifying little pile of god only knows what, he snaps awake immediately in a state of absolute disgust before his brain even really processes anything.

There are no cats that he can see, so he has no idea who it could have come from. He also doesn’t recall hearing anything weird, and it definitely wasn’t there when he got up in the night to use the bathroom. Sousuke thinks to himself that he’s glad he wasn’t wearing socks, since then he’d have an extra pair to wash, and gets up to clean the ick off the bottom of his foot and get some paper towels to pick the gross off the bedroom floor.

Haru is the next unfortunate victim of the stealth hairball cat. He nearly steps in it while going to take a bath, but very narrowly avoids the mess on the mat on the bathroom floor. It is just as, if not more, gross than what Sousuke had disgustingly detailed to him the day before. The only cat around this time is Sunshine, who is dead to the world while curled up in the bathroom sink, and Haru knows from experience that when that cat decides on a sink nap, he naps for hours.

There are a few more random instances of hairballs appearing, and it never gets any less gross to see them and have to clean them up. Sousuke and Haru decide to make a rule that whoever finds it has to clean it, since they both agree it is the most disgusting thing and won’t do it for each other. As an added bonus, this is a standing house rule, so if one of their friends is the unfortunate sucker who finds one, they have to clean it themselves as well.

Makoto is next next person to find and subsequently have to clean up a horrifying little mess, and like the other times, there are no cats nearby to blame. As of yet, the puking cat has been extraordinarily sneaky about barfing its little “presents” up, although they all have different ideas on which cat or cats they think it is.

Mostly the bets are on Little Momo or Macky, with the reasoning that it can’t be healthy to be having critters of varying states of life and death in your mouth all the time, especially when they are all dirty earth living critters. There’s a chance it could be Mochi for much the same reason, seeing as she is entirely too fond of carrying that evil little bunny around in her jaws.

One day a week or so after the first surprise Sousuke and Haru are curled together on the living room couch when they hear a peculiar noise coming from the direction of the bathroom. They look at each other quizzically before very quietly getting up and venturing to see if it was what they thought it was. As they pop their heads around the doorjamb, they are both surprised at who is revealed to be the culprit, but there is no doubt, mostly because they’ve caught her in the act.

Beautiful, sweet, harmless Pearl is the perpetrator to the disgusting crimes. Both Haru and Sousuke would not have guessed that this would be the trouble cat. They have a brief scuffle to decide who has to clean the mess, since technically speaking they both found it, but weighing a little more heavy on their minds is figuring out the why behind the hairballs.

This is actually discovered by Rin, by complete coincidence, while he wanders the house in search of something to amuse himself. He happens to be looking out one of the windows facing the back of the house, and when he returns to the living room, he mentions that he saw a cat eating grass in the backyard.

Just after he finishes speaking they hear they telltale sound of cat yakking, and Haru stares at Sousuke until he gets up to see if it is the same cat. He makes Rin go with him and then somehow cons Rin into cleaning the mess. Haru makes use of the information and looks up on the internet to figure out what is the correlation.

It turns out that Pearl was having a sort of stomach issue, and was eating the grass to try and force whatever it was that was bothering her to get out, much how a human could take medicine and induce vomiting. They take her to a nearby vet and they get it all straightened out.

Everybody is relieved to not have to deal with frequent hairballs, although there is one once in a blue moon. The hairball rule still stands in the apartment, but overall they are all just glad they won’t find one every ten steps. Pearl is just pleased she feels better and continues to be a sweet wonderful girl. Sousuke develops a long standing habit of checking over the side of the bed before putting his feet down.


	18. Juroo Is the Best Big Bro Cat Ever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](https://assets.rbl.ms/572255/980x.jpg) is Little Momo and Juroo.

Like Gisa, Little Momo can be quite the handful. He has a penchant for running amok, and is often goaded on by Gisa, which just turns into two tornados flying around Haru and Sousuke’s apartment. And Nagisa and Momo into the mix, and everybody else might as well just evacuate the place and hope it doesn’t wind up as rubble after they are all done.

Unlike Gisa, Little Momo has the addition of a big brother who luckily is unlike the crazy other cats, and actually manages to control his frantic little brother and put him on a metaphorical leash. (If he had opposable thumbs and the means to buy a collar and leash he would probably do it literally as well.)

Juroo is a surprisingly sweet and well mannered tomcat, especially when you consider that his younger sibling is the crazy and high strung Little Momo. He treats most of the smaller cats as if they too are his siblings, especially Ai and Kou-chii, who he seems to take a particular liking to. Oftentimes Juroo will take control of not only Momo, but also of Gisa, who tends to obey Juroo’s commands as well.

Most of the other cats seem to treat him with respect as well, as if they are impressed that he manages to deal with being related to Little Momo without resorting to murder, or at least maiming. With Juroo around to calm the more rambunctious cats, the others find that they can have a nice quiet nap while he’s around to be a buffer between the crazy young ones and the ones that just want to sleep.

Juroo also has what must be a radar for when his brother is getting into trouble, because every time that Little Momo gets stuck in a drawer, or locked in a closet, or tangled up in a hanging wire, Juroo is there to gently (or not so gently, depending on the situation) pull him out of it no worse for the wear.

Another day, Little Momo manages to again anger the paranoid squirrel in the backyard of the apartment, and this time Rin is not around with any of his distractingly shiny clothes and shark toothed grin to frighten it away for him. Luckily for Little Momo, Juroo is hanging around to keep an eye on him and takes over the squirrel chasing duty. Being as tough looking as he is, the squirrel decides that he should abandon his quest for another day and takes off for parts unknown.

After making sure that the squirrel is no longer in sight, Juroo hooks a paw over Little Momo’s slightly lankier body and pulls him half under him in what seems to be a brotherly kitty hug, and they settle there on the floor to take a nap in a tiny pile of orange fur, with Juroo using Little Momo as a furry pillow.


	19. Suke and the Sneakily Secret Snuggles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [This](http://i878.photobucket.com/albums/ab350/mangaanimals7/Felines/Thorn.jpg) beauty is Suke.

Haru probably wouldn’t ever admit it, but he did have a favorite cat out of all the cats that frequented their apartment. Of course Rin was very high on his list, especially after he stopped crying so much and just found a comfy spot on Haru’s shoulder to perch while he went about his business, but he wasn’t Haru’s favorite.

No, Haru’s favorite was the one cat that he actually made an effort to bring to the apartment himself, one that, even while injured, was still stoic and kept to himself, which made Haru think immediately that he knew someone with exactly the same disposition. Of course, everyone knew who he named the cat after, including the person in question, not that Haru would acknowledge it.

But Suke turned out to be much more like the human he resembled than even Haru had thought possible. He isn’t exactly the friendliest cat, but he’s not an asshole either. He seems to want to try to pay Haru back for picking him up and bringing him home and helping his injury, and he makes an effort to be a well mannered cat.

He also tries desperately to control the rowdier members of the cat population, without actually going around smacking the other cats around, and so he mostly resorts to glaring and pointed stares at the other cats, which they quite easily ignore. He’s also there should there be a cat fight, silently glowering and trying to break it up without getting too in the middle of it.

Haru’s also seen him quietly and unobtrusively helping and supporting the other cats, especially the smaller ones. Sometimes if there are a lot of cats around at the same time, it’s hard for Ai and Kou-chii to get to the food bowl, and Suke will wander over and silently stare at the other cats until they shift over so the littler ones can eat as well.

On the rare occasion that Juroo isn’t around, it seems to be left to Suke to keep a weather eye on the troublemaker little brother, and Suke has managed to ward off a few angry squirrels and remove from the apartment quite a few bugs that Little Momo has just left around. One memorable day even had Suke picking Little Momo up by his scruff and depositing him on the couch before half leaning on him to get him to settle and take a nap.

All of these things make Suke even more likable to Haru, but his favorite thing about Suke is how he covertly cuddles with Haru. He is pretty much the opposite of Rin. You couldn’t catch him purposely making someone cuddle with him, but he does cuddle with Haru when he thinks that no one is around to acknowledge it.

At night he waits until Haru is breathing in a regular rhythm before hopping up on the bed and finding an appropriate spot to get comfortable in, usually so close that Haru can feel the warm spot his furry body makes when he wakes in the night. One night Haru purposefully measures his breathing to see if he can tell when Suke decides is the best time to climb up. Suke just barely waits until Haru’s breath is even before he decides it’s long enough.

Haru wakes with the warmth of the cat against him, and it is such a pleasant feeling that he often just lies there still mostly sleeping to feel the small furry body moving with his tiny breaths and delicate purrs. Eventually it seems like Suke decides that he doesn’t much mind being more open with his cuddling, which is entirely pleasing to Haru.

Occasionally, when Haru is perched on the couch, even when Rin is nestled against Haru’s shoulder, Suke will hop up onto the couch and lay next to Haru’s hip, or if he’s stretched out along the couch, on Haru’s lap or legs.

Sousuke walks in one day to see exactly this, Haru stretched out along the couch, tiny Rin cat burrowed in the junction of Haru’s shoulder and neck, and Suke curled loosely into a purring ball on Haru’s lap, while Haru perches his feet above Koko on the other arm of the couch. He may or may not take a picture, but he will never, ever tell anyone.


End file.
